Colleen Kennedy

My name is Colleen Kennedy and I am currently a professional soccer player for Þór/KA (Thór/KA) in Iceland’s Pepsi Max League (Úrvalsdeild). The story of my injury that changed my life is a bit different than most and a little long but a quick backstory of myself is I started playing soccer later than most but quickly fell in love with the game. Over my years in multiple sports leading into college, I had always had the normal knocks that any player would get but never an injury that had required a surgery. When I decided to go to the University of Mobile I told myself that I would do my best to come in and be the most fit and determined freshman they had. I had no expectation of being a starter being behind 3 All-American forwards but wanted to be the first name the coach would call when needing a sub. Preseason went well, passed my fitness test and even achieved my first goal of getting minutes so early in the season.

Everything was going well for my first two months of the season and one day in September I had the feeling as if I was constantly stepping on a rock. I went to my athletic trainer and he said I had plantar fasciitis so of course we start doing treatments for it. I continued playing and even earned a starting spot but treatments were not fixing my problem. When the end of the season came I went to get checked out by a doctor who diagnosed me in under 15 seconds with morton’s neuroma (which is a nerve in your foot that is irritated or damaged). The doctor suggests surgery the next week and I wish I would have taken a minute to get second opinion with how fast he was in and out of the room but at 18 years old you don’t really question the doctor the university sends you to.So the next week I have the surgery and is supposed to be an 8 week recovery. The 8 weeks go by and my foot was still just as messed up as it was before. I missed almost the whole off season trying to let it rest but also work through the normal post surgery pain that you get. Once I was home for summer I felt it was time to go to another doctor back home to see if I was just being dramatic or if this was something more. Thankfully I did go for a second opinion to one of my family’s long time friends because he took some x-rays and an MRI, which the first doctor never did, to confirm I had broken my fibular sesamoid (which is basically the ball of your foot). My doctor told me the recovery time for myself was going to need to be 6-8 months because of the last surgery I had. My coach approved of a red shirt year so I had the second foot surgery two weeks later. One week after the surgery my coach called and said he needed me back this season because we didn’t get the recruit he wanted for the upcoming season. Like any true athlete, if your coach says the team needs you back you do what you have to do to be back out there. From the day of surgery to the first day of preseason I had 7 weeks to get back, so I did. Physically I powered through the physical therapy, water treadmills and dry needling but mentally I should not have played that season looking back now. I went through a period of depression during my sophomore season. I wasn’t able to perform to the standard I had for myself or that my team had expected of me and I did I have the random moments of emptiness and sadness but my attitude was so far off that I had gotten 7 yellow cards that season for my mouth alone and even into an argument with my coach mid game once. For anyone who knows me, that is not who I am. I have always carried myself in a professional manner when I am with any team but I was feeling lower than I had ever felt and I didn’t realize how I was even acting.

After the season had passed, I sat down with two of my teammates and just looked at them and said, “I think I am depressed. I don’t know why I have been feeling this way but I can’t seem to find joy in the things I know I love.” I am forever grateful for those two teammates who truly helped me through the darkest point in my life and helped me with the entire process of getting the help I needed months ago before that. After seeing someone about being depressed and actually coming back from my surgeries the right way, I had the best season of my life. My stats were up, attitude was better, became a true team player and even was able to become an All-American that season. As crazy as it sounds I am forever thankful that my injury happened to me. I have had two other surgeries for my knee and nose since then and this process made me capable of being able to tackle those too. I learned so much about myself throughout the entire process with my foot. I learned how much strength I actually have within myself mentally and physically and became a better person out of it. Without this injury I would not be the player or person I am today and I hope by sharing my story that it can help someone!